on your birthday
the first without you
i spend the morning at walmart
flourescent portal

first left
down to the end
i can see you
in the christmas aisle
comparing string lights

how your stride
covered eternity
then and now
carrying up through
the inflatables
the fish tanks
men's pajamas

i can still feel
the pull
of the metal netting
as my hand grips the cart
forever running
to catch up with you

where did you go, dad?
are you still there, wondering
white lights, or yellow?